Requiem
by Emmychao
Summary: Implied AkihikoxFeMC. The irony was that she had been playing her own requiem all along.


"_Little lonely girl and her piano… so alone, so alone…_"

My slim fingers delicately dropped onto the pearly white keys with painful precision. I could feel my eyelids droop, and soon enough, I found myself staring into space as my own melody dared to lull me to sleep. With a slight start, I shook myself back to attention and continued playing the haunting tune, my fingers pounding the keys with more urgency when the piece picked up, my foot struggling to keep pace on the sustain peddle. I was thankful that the Music Room was empty today because otherwise, I wouldn't dare play the grand piano. I hadn't had an audience since…

"_Ten years ago…_" I voiced breathlessly. My fingers slowed, and within moments, they stopped altogether, hovering above the keyboard hesitantly, the sweet sounds echoing through the large room. A soft sigh involuntarily escaped my lips, and before I knew it, I had pushed myself away from the majestic instrument.

I was pretty sure that I was running away, but that was okay with me. After all, I fearlessly led SEES on the most dangerous missions imaginable and still managed to smile through them all (minus the first full moon mission with Yukari and Junpei when I cried, but still…), so I had to be allowed moments of vulnerability like this, too, right? I collected my forgotten bag from the corner of the room and pulled my pilfered Music Room key out of my schoolbag. If Mitsuru-senpai ever found out that I had taken it when Akihiko-senpai and I had searched the Faculty Office for the Gym Storage key, I was positive that I'd never hear the end of it.

Carefully, I poked my head out into the hall to search for any forms of life. When I realized that there was indeed no one around, I breathed out in relief. I was lucky that most clubs weren't meeting today and that it was late enough that most people wouldn't still be around anyway. After making sure I had brought all of my belongings out with me, I finally shut and locked the door behind me.

"What're you still doing here?"

I jumped in alarm at the sudden question, the masculine tone sending shivers down my spine. Warily, I turned and found myself face-to-face with Akihiko-senpai. I could already feel the blood desert my head, leaving me lightheaded and pale. If he told Mitsuru-senpai about this, I would definitely get an earful and maybe only that if I was lucky. Suddenly feeling depressed and anxious at the same time, I lowered my gaze to the ground.

"…Is something wrong?" He sounded slightly uncomfortable, concern clumsily working its way into his words. I shook my head knowing full well that waterworks were bound to start if I tried to speak while holding his gaze. He seemed to grunt in response, and I could imagine him running his hand through his hair in mild frustration. Dealing with women wasn't his strongpoint, after all, so I cleared my throat in an attempt to alleviate his dilemma.

"You won't tell Mitsuru-senpai about this, right?" I willed the tears to wait just in case this was all a misunderstanding. Perhaps he hadn't seen me exit the Music Room, in which case, I'd be safe. I glanced up at the upperclassman through my ginger fringe and waited patiently for his answer.

"About what? The fact that you were in the Music Room?" I flinched at not only the bluntness of his words but also the fact that I _had_ been caught. There was an extended pause before he continued, "Don't look so worried. It's not like I'll tell Mitsuru or anything."

"Ehh?" My eyes widened and immediately flew to meet his. He chuckled slightly and waved a gloved hand dismissively.

"Actually, I was doing some private training myself in the club room earlier. That's why I'm still here."

Ah, so now we were kindred spirits.

"So you don't want to be a hypocrite, I suppose?" I asked then added with a small giggle, "How sweet of you." He seemed taken aback by my sudden change in attitude, and I could've sworn I saw pink dust across his cheeks. It was either that or a trick of the lighting. I wasn't quite sure.

"Y-yeah, I guess so." We sunk into a semi-comfortable silence, but I could tell there was something else on my senpai's mind. I adjusted my bag's strap before it could fall off my shoulder and shifted my weight to my other leg.

"What's so special about the Music Room?" he finally asked, obviously trying to be tactful about his words for once. Since I was already caught, I thought I might as well come clean before I got cornered any further. I held up the room's spare key that I was still holding with a bittersweet smile.

"I just wanted to play the piano." I tucked the key away so I wouldn't lose it and turned back to Akihiko-senpai. "Want to walk home with me?"

I could tell that he wasn't entirely satisfied with my answer when I saw how his eyes glimmered with curiosity, but he did a good job masking it with his usual indifference. I had no idea until now that I had become so skilled at reading his expressions, or maybe I was just being presumptuous and thought I had become good at it. It was a hard call these days, but then again, I had been spending quite a bit of time with the senior as of late.

The walk back to the dorms was silent and generally uneventful. It seemed luck was on my side for once… until Akihiko-senpai stopped and turned to me with a bashful expression about a block away from the dormitory. He rubbed the back of his head shyly and stared straight into my eyes the way he always did when he was about to ask or say something personal. An uncomfortable feeling settled in my stomach, but I couldn't quite place what it was.

"Would it be alright if…" he trailed off as if searching for the right words, "…I listened to you play the piano sometime? It'll be our secret."

So that's what it was…

I looked away and focused my attention of the rough cement of the sidewalk, deep in thought. Every person I ever played for… An image of Mother and Father flashed through my mind and caused me to jolt in shock. They always died.

"H-hey, you don't have to. I-I mean…" I glanced at my senpai out of the corner of my eye and saw the hurt that momentarily flashed across his face. He must have misinterpreted my reaction.

"N-no, it's not that," I stammered in reply, waving my hands to get his attention back on me. "It's just that… I'm not very good, so I don't want to disappoint you," I lied with furrowed brows. I couldn't let him be like everyone else I had played for... That was why the rest of the family had taken to calling me "the unlucky child" and passed me around like a curse.

Of course, there was no way I was going to tell this to anyone else. Not even Akihiko-senpai. It was for the best…

"Oh, I just remembered that I need to get some studying done!" I fibbed once again, running in the direction of the dorm in desperation. I only paused to give him a brief wave and a forced smile. If anything, I was just going to lock myself in my room and retreat to my own little world of arias and requiems.

"_Poor thing…_" the faceless crowd crooned in the back of my mind, their cold, unfeeling words biting into my skin, "_…lost both of her parents at the tender age of seven._"

"_She'll never turn out right,_" another voice cut in with a laugh. "_She needs good parents to set her straight._"

"_Who will take her in?_"

"_Not me. I don't need an unlucky black cat under my roof._"

"_What's so unlucky about her?_" a curious, ignorant voice questioned from the side. The blank figures suddenly grew wide smiles.

"_Didn't you hear? She played the piano for her class, and…_"

"_All the children got really sick!_"

"_That's nothing! The teacher who had been giving her the lessons died._"

There was a collective gasp from the many ambiguous bodies.

"_He was such a happy and healthy young man! Then the next thing you know, he's gone and committed suicide!_"

"_Oh, and didn't you know? They were coming back from her piano recital that night._"

"_You mean—?_"

"_Don't you find it odd that the accident killed her parents and so many of the attendees but left her unharmed?_"

"_How disturbing!_"

"_I don't want her in my house!_"

"_Can't we just send her to the orphanage?_"

"_Nope. Mother would flip!_"

"_If only she was healthy enough to take care of the little brat herself…_"

"_What a pain…_"

I awoke with a start in cold sweat and scanned the room fearfully, wanting nothing more than the confirmation that I was no longer dreaming. The nightmarish figures were absent and the room was familiar and empty, which confirmed that I was within the safety of my bedroom in the dorm and not at the funeral service of my parents surrounded by my taunting relatives. I let out the choked, silent sob that I was never able to let out in neither the dream nor the past.

"I would've rather gone to the orphanage than deal with _you people_," I growled under my breath as I futilely tried to wipe my tears away, but I realized that I hadn't meant the words at all. There had been one person who actually cared, but even he was… It had been so long since the last time I had had that dream and been forced to remember the past, so now that I had, I couldn't stop crying.

"Hey," I heard Yukari through the door and detected the concern in her normally cheery voice. "Are you okay? I noticed that you haven't left your room all day, and I was wondering if you had gotten sick again..."

Blankly, my eyes flitted to the clock on the wall, and I couldn't help but grimace. I had slept in until nearly noon, which was unusual for an early riser like me. Wobbling out of bed, I made a point to go to my mirror before answering the door, and what I saw did not amuse me in the least. It was obvious that I had been crying my eyes out, but there was no way I could let anyone see me like this.

"I-I'm not feeling very well today, so I'm just going to stay in here and rest," I lied to my best friend through the heavy wood of the door. All the crying had finally caught up to me and forced me into a ruthless coughing fit. That seemed to convince her of my condition because I could hear her sharp, alarmed gasp on the other side of the door.

"Okay, u-um, just take it easy today! I'll go tell everyone that you probably won't be in any condition to go to Tartarus today…" And then she was gone. I crumpled to the floor, my knees absorbing the most force, and with a wince, I noted that they'd probably bruise later.

"Why am I such a liar?" I whispered to myself despondently. I used to think of myself as a cheerful and honest girl, but really, on the inside, I was just a lost child who hid behind pretty lies and half-truths… Then again, maybe that was what gave me the power to wield multiple personae.

A yawn suddenly escaped me, so I lazily glanced at the clock with my half-lidded eyes. As tired as I still was, there was no way I'd be able to sleep anytime soon because of that nightmare. Regardless, I hauled my heavy body back into bed and pulled the covers over my head with a muffled whimper. That kind Onii-chan from the past wasn't going to come back, so I needed to accept it…

"_Those people weren't very nice._"

I jumped from my spot on the piano's bench and whirled around to face the newcomer. He was much older than my seven years and his eyes were bright yet enigmatic, with one constantly shielded by his dark hair. The boy gave me a small smile before joining me at the piano, his hands removing themselves from his pockets.

"_So you play the piano? I play the violin myself._"

"Eh? So you play music too, Onii-chan?" I asked excitedly and cocked my head to the side in an effort to get a good look at his face. The mysterious boy put a slim finger to his lips, though it didn't hide his boyish grin.

"_Shhh, not so loud,_" he scolded half-heartedly. I couldn't help but nod eagerly in response. This boy was so strange and warm, but if anyone else knew, they might try to separate us.

"…Those were lies…" I mumbled in an effort to defend myself. All those events had been taken out of context, but everyone bought into them anyway. The accident happened first, and it was all because of that weird time that no one believed me about. And no one went to school the day after that, not even me (though, I was in the hospital that day). The only thing I wasn't sure about was my teacher's death. Maybe that one really was my fault…? "It's all because of that scary time that no one knows about. The coffins, the moon, the blood… everything. It's so scary..."

"_I know about it._"

"Really?" I couldn't help but tear slightly. No one ever believed me… then again, they never took much time to listen to me in the first place. They always said that I was just "traumatized" or something.

"_Yep, and we're not alone._"

Time passed and before I knew it, I came to view that boy as a real, true brother. He always made a point to appear when everyone else was gone and seemed to know just what to say to make me feel better. Our meeting spot was always at the piano.

"_You've gotten better,_" he commented one day from his perch next to me. I couldn't help but smile at his praise.

"I want to get better, so I can play with you!"

"_With me?_" he questioned with a tilt of his head. "_You want to play a duet with me?_"

"I can't?"

"_No, it's just that… Never mind. I'll play with you._" I had no idea where his violin came from, but he suddenly had it and was now standing in position. His shoulders were straight, and his back was erect, the bow at ready.

My fingers fell onto the keys before I could even think of what I was playing, and soon enough, the poignant sound of his violin joined in. It didn't occur to me at the time how strange it was that we could suddenly play a song that I didn't know and how we could somehow be perfectly in sync with each other. Several measures in, I couldn't help but add to the music with a hum that gradually transformed into a full release of my voice.

It was a haunting performance, my fingers automatically moving to strike phrases I didn't realize I knew, and my voice reaching a high soprano and sustaining itself over long measures with breath I _knew_ I didn't have. The boy's violin pierced the melody with sharp lines; yet, it seemed so at home and tied the piece together. Once the piano's echoes died down, I looked over at Onii-chan expectantly.

"_That was a wonderful performance._" My eyes widened as he became increasingly translucent, fading away into nothingness.

"O-Onii-chan? Where are y-you going?"

"_I'm tired, so I'm just going to rest a bit. I'll be there when you must make important decisions, though. After all, you'll be responsible for what you choose…_"

"What?" I was on the verge of tears and reaching out for him. "Don't leave me! I don't even know what song we played together, and… I want to play it with you again. Don't go!"

"_I'm not going anywhere,_" he chided with his usual smile. "_I'm just going to sleep for a bit. And that song is something you've always known…_"

"'_Aria of the Soul' is its name._"

I opened my eyes and realized that I was no longer in the lonely white room with the piano but in reality once again. I shielded my eyes from the rest of the world with my arms and let out a sigh. It was obvious why I didn't want to play for others… They always disappeared in the end.

"'Aria of the Soul'? More like 'Requiem'…" I muttered softly.

"_That's not true, and you know it. Music can't drive people away._"

"Prove it," I found myself whispering back to the voice in my head once I had trotted across the room to retrieve my uniform. A guttural chuckle resounded in my head, and I frowned in response while pulling my pajama top off and swapping it for my school blouse.

"_If it does anything, it brings people together. Didn't you ever notice?_"

…It made my parents happier and gave us reasons to spend time together, it helped me make friends in class when I was still too shy, it always brought a smile to my instructor's face when he noticed my hands were becoming steadier, and it gave me a dear brother figure to guide me in life…

"_Don't be so afraid. Go ahead and play the piano for that senpai you like so much. Nothing bad will happen,_" he promised.

I sniffled slightly and gave him a teary nod. "Okay, Onii-chan."

I could've sworn I saw his boyish grin for a moment in the mirror.

After school had ended, I nearly skipped down the stairs into the Lab Hall where I knew Akihiko-senpai would be waiting and decided that I would spend time with him. He seemed surprised when I dragged him down the hall and into the Music Room, but not one complaint left him nor reached my ears. I locked the door behind us and ran the piano in the corner with a wide smile.

"I thought that you said—"

"Yeah, but I lied. Sorry, Akihiko-senpai," I apologized, focusing my attention on the piano and avoiding his eyes. "I was just afraid before, but your words made me reconsider... Oh, and don't blame me if I'm not actually that good!"

I looked up in time to see him let one of his rare playful smiles grace his face in reply.

Months later while I lay on Aki's lap, my eyes drooping shut permanently, I couldn't help but let a lone tear escape and roll down my cheek. Everything felt so unfair, but there was nothing I could do about it. The situation just screamed irony. After his promise to never leave me, the only words I could think of at that moment were not for him but were directed at the violin boy with the dark hair.

"_You're a liar. All along, _I_ was the one being driven away._" And then my eyes finally closed and brought me back to my lonely world of white with the same lonesome piano in the corner. In the blink of an eye, my Onii-chan was back, though he barely looked older than me as I was now. He held his violin up expectantly and gave me that same smile.

"_I believe you wanted to play that duet with me again?_" he asked quietly even though he must've already known the answer. I threw my arms up, tossed in the white towel, and sat at the glowing piano with a bitter smile, and the boy fixed his posture when the dark notes broke the world of white.

How sad that I was playing my own requiem all along.

* * *

A/N: Damn. Angst. I don't like to write it for a reason (basically, I fail at it). Cookies for those who know who the violin boy is. Now to go write something on a happier note…

(This was originally a challenge to myself to write an entire one-shot of a sizable length in one day. It sucked. Hardcore.)


End file.
